Building Resilient Kids: The Benefits Of Emotional Regulation Skills


Teaching kids to manage their emotions is one of the hardest things you can do as a parent. But it’s also one of the most crucial. When kids can regulate themselves, so many other things fall into place.


As a parent, when your child is dysregulated, it’s concerning. You’re concerned about how it will impact:

  • Behavioral issues
  • Social relationships
  • Academic performance
  • Long-term behavioral or psychological issues


Today we’re talking all about emotional regulation and how regulating emotions can help with everything from improved communication to better relationships and decision-making. 


What Is Emotional Regulation?


Emotional regulation is simply your ability to appropriately respond and manage your feelings and emotions. 1 regulation skills aren’t something we’re born with because the part of the brain that controls emotions takes longer to fully develop. 


Emotional regulation happens both consciously and unconsciously and it can get better with time (as kids develop). But most people will need to hone these skills throughout their lives. 2

The Benefits Of Emotional Regulation Skills

As a parent, you’re constantly worried about your child. You want to give them the skills they need to be independent, fully functioning humans. When your kids can’t regulate their emotions, it’s hard on the whole family. 


When you focus on improving emotional regulation, it has so many benefits. Kids who have emotional regulation skills can improve their:2

  • Mental and emotional health
  • Academic performance
  • Physical health
  • Relationships with parents, teachers, and peers
  • Empathy and compassion for others
  • Decision-making skills
  • Overall happiness 

Let’s take a deeper dive into five aspects of your child’s life that can improve with emotional regulation skills.

5 Aspects of Life That Improve With Emotional Regulation 


When your child can improve emotional regulation skills they can improve communication, relationships with family and friends, improve academic performance, learn to be more resilient, and even make better decisions.


Improved communication


When your child can regulate their emotions, the first step is recognizing what they are feeling. After they learn how to identify their feelings, you can work on teaching them appropriate ways to express themselves. Once they learn that their feelings are valid and they have a safe space to express feelings and emotions, the door to increased self-awareness and improved communication opens.


Improving communication early in your child’s life can set you up for a healthy, long-lasting trusting relationship with them. 


Improved relationships with friends and family


Kids who learn emotional regulation skills are very self-aware and in tune with their thoughts and feelings. This can help them to be more empathetic and compassionate towards others. When your kids can see things from other people’s perspectives and have empathy and compassion for what others are going through in life, it helps elevate relationships to another level. It leads to building trust with others and can help with conflict resolution skills which help facilitate healthy relationships.


Better decision-making 

If there is one thing parents want to help their kids with, it’s making better decisions. Emotional regulation helps with impulse control. As kids hone their emotional regulation skills they act less impulsively in response to strong emotions such as anger, frustration, sadness, and fear. 


When someone has good emotional regulation skills it helps them take a pause and reflect before making a decision. As a parent, you know it takes time to teach your child to consider the pros and cons of a situation. Improving their impulse control leads to having more self-control overall, leading them to take that pause they need.3

Every child at some point in time will make a poor decision or will have to face the consequences of their actions. With improved emotional regulation skills they are better equipped to handle the consequences and learn from their mistakes. 


Improved academic performance


Emotional regulation can help improve academic performance in many different ways. It can help improve relationships with friends and teachers, making the school day a more positive experience. Kids who have good emotional regulation skills have better problem-solving skills which can lead to decreased anxiety about school and tests. Learning to regulate emotions can increase engagement and participation in school. It can also increase resilience when they encounter a challenge because they will know how to manage their emotions during tough times. 

Improved mental and emotional resilience


Resilience is when your kids can bounce back from difficult situations. Being able to regulate your emotions can help kids improve mental and emotional resilience because when kids can regulate their emotions, understand their feelings, and process them,  it’s much easier to bounce back from hardships. 


Kids who hone emotional regulation skills learn to handle stress better and have improved flexible thinking skills becuase they can see things from other people’s perspectives, learn to adapt to changes, deal with uncertainty, and think about things from different angles. 

Can NeurOptimal® Help With Emotional Regulation?


There are many tools you can use to improve emotional regulation skills. NeurOptimal® is just one tool that can help optimize the brain for best performance. When the brain is optimized and works better for you, it’s easier to hone emotional regulation skills. 

NeurOptimal® has been designated as a general wellness product by the FDA to help:

  • Promote healthy sleep habits
  • Improve mental acuity 
  • Manage stress
  • Increase emotional resilience
  • Helps with performance or sports anxiety
  • Helps promote relaxation
  • Brings the user back to the present moment

When you experience these benefits, it allows the brain to be in a calmer, more relaxed state. This in itself can help improve emotional regulation skills but it can also help kids be more open to other strategies they learn.


Neurofeedback is like holding a mirror up to your brain, meaning it gives your brain the information it needs to make its own adjustments. 


It works by detecting when your brain makes a sudden shift or experiences turbulence and allows the brain to self-correct. Your brain is already trained to do this. In fact, a feedback loop in your brain already exists, and your brain self-corrects when needed. NeurOptimal® is just tapping into this ability, allowing your brain to do the work to find optimal functioning.

Over time, this allows your brain to automatically shift toward optimal functioning.

NeurOptimal® And Special Needs Kids

One thing I love about NeurOptimal® is that it’s passive brain training that anyone can do. If you have a child with special needs who has difficulty sitting still or participating in other therapies, NeurOptimal® is a great tool. Once you hook up the sensors, the machine does all the work and they can sit back and watch a movie or listen to music. 

We see time and time again that many traditional therapies don’t get to the root of emotional regulation issues (or don’t address them at all). When the brain is optimized it promotes relaxation, enhances learning capacity, and can help you have better outcomes when you’re learning to improve emotional regulation skills.

Do you have a child with Autism? You can check out our blog specifically on emotional regulation and Autism Spectrum Disorders here. 

Want To Learn More About Neurofeedback?

If you’re interested in learning more about neurofeedback and how it can help the whole family, join our Facebook group, Neurofeedback Moms (Dads are welcome too).

We have a great community of parents learning about neurofeedback, asking questions, and sharing their experiences.

In the group you’ll get:

  • Research-based information to help you make the best decisions for your family
  • Live support from experts in parenting, neurofeedback, nutrition, therapy, and neuroscience
  • Two-minute tidbits where I go live and share digestible information about neurofeedback in two minutes or less
  • Lifetime access to all live recordings – watch at your convenience!
  • Support when you need it!

Join us inside Neurofeedback Moms. We can’t wait to meet you.


  1. Cornell Research Program: What Is Emotional Regulation And How Do We Do It?
  2. Alvarado Parkway Institute: Emotional Regulation: What Is It And Why Is It Important?
  3. UCLA Center For The Developing Adolescent



Disclaimer: This site contains information on general health and wellness topics. Please note that NeurOptimal® has been designated a general wellness product by the FDA. The information on this site or in any linked materials should not be construed as medical advice. The information in this article is not intended to replace any recommendations by your healthcare provider.